A pastor’s wife can be a terrific asset to her husband’s ministry if she really learns to love and understand people. By truly loving them, she will be very willing to help and give of herself by wanting the best for everyone and their children. By understanding them, she will be patient, longsuffering, and willing to go the second mile. Here are a few things you should, however, avoid at all costs:
1. Don’t react. You may cause your husband unnecessary problems in the church if you are the type to either react or overreact to any little issue.
2. Don’t have your hands in every single aspect of the ministry. It’s not necessary. It’s one thing to gently oversee certain areas and quite another to control everything.
3. Don’t ever betray a confidence. A confidence betrayed is a wound and will cause some to question whether or not you can be trusted.
4. Don’t make rules that your husband isn’t aware of.
5. Do not insist on your way of doing things all the time.
6. Be patient with people. Remember how patient the Lord is with us.
7. Don’t overwork and overload certain ladies and teens because they’re always so willing to work.
8. Roll up your sleeves and get busy. There’s no reason we can’t work right along with the ladies.
9. Don’t look for your sense of value or appreciation from others. Work with all your heart for the glory of God.
As a true servant to the Lord, her good husband and to others, a wise pastor’s wife “…earnestly desireth the shadow...” Job 7:2. Our place of service is right beside our husbands and we shouldn’t look for praise or recognition. Everything we do—no matter how much, no matter how many hours we spend behind the scenes—is all just our reasonable service.
If you struggle with feelings of insignificance or feel you are not appreciated for all you do, I want to challenge you to head into this New Year with a new perspective. Don’t look around you for the reward of you labor, but count it all joy that you have the wonderful privilege to serve Christ. Let all you do be done for Christ’s glory and not for the praise of men. After all, the works of our hands are such a small token compared to all He has done for us.
